Whoa! This isn't what it looks like!

Or... is it?

Whoa Whoa WHOA!!!  Babe, I swear this isn’t what it looks like! 

Umm… yeah, it’s me.  Your husband Rob.  Okay, you’ve got me there… yes, I guess it does look like I’ve been magically transformed into a woman.  And…. Yeah, I guess it does look like that’s Trevor the gardener fucking me.   Sure sure…. We’re fucking in your arts and crafts room.  Okay, yes, I’m wearing your makeup.  But wait… oh… yup, that’s your hair product too.  Those?  Oh, yeah, I guess those ARE your fake nails.  But babe, listen.  I just wanted to… what’s that?  Yes, I admit that I used your grandmother’s spell book.  That’s right, I blackmailed Trevor into doing this and not the other way around.  Wait…. It’s THAT little thing that you’re pissed about?  You didn’t think that Trevor found your spell book, transformed me, made me up int a sexy young woman with your makeup, nails, and hair products so that he could blackmail me and make me into his little sex slave toy?  Oh jeez Karen, it’s not like…

Fine, FINE!  I’ll repeat after you exactly. 

“I, Jonathan, promise that when I use her spell book to transform myself into a woman to have mind blowing blackmailed sex with the gardener in my wife’s craft room, while wearing my her nails and makeup, and using her hair product, will never stead her belly button ring.”

Now can you get out of here and give us some privacy?  The spell’s going to wear off in a few minutes and I’m not done yet!

source:  fuskator