Sunday, May 11, 2014

Don't Look Back In Anger

Slip inside the eye of your mind

This is what I'm constantly afraid of.... caps like this.  When I find it difficult to get up and going I'm afraid that I can force a cap out but that at the end I'll just find it lacking.  And I do find this cap lacking.  It's too late to pull it back and either make it a blog exclusive or just throw it into the circular filing system as it's already posted to Helena's folder on the Haven.

You see, I did get enjoyment out of making this cap.  I enjoyed finding the image.  I enjoyed working out what was happening in the photo (she was driving away both from the person that did this to her as well as her life as a man).  I enjoyed thinking up and designing the title (it helped that I was listening to one of my favorite songs over and over).  I enjoyed giving her angry thoughts a story and merging them into the mirror.  I more or less enjoyed fleshing out the story and giving it a true narrative feel.

So if I enjoyed each piece of  this cap... then why don't I enjoy it as a whole?  And why oh why didn't I realize this BEFORE posting.  The last question is easy enough to answer I guess... I get a rush by creating something and I ride that rush right into posting it.  The first question... that's harder to put my finger on.  I guess first thing is that I'm not sure the story really works.  I don't go into why this guy changed Harm into Helena... I don't go into if Harm knew him, or if it was revenge, or if it was even magical.  I know we can always cut out the unnecessary parts, but I'm afraid I left to much to the imagination.  I mean, you can't even get an emotional feel from the cap without my overt hints like the title or the coloring of the mirror font.

But it's more than that.  The design, while a little interesting, feels like it needs another layer of polish.  Maybe the test needs to line up in a more justified way... or find a way to have the story be all on the same level instead of cut into two parts.  Maybe I could differentiate the text from the background in something less overt than a shadow.   Maybe I could have selected a complimentary color instead of bland old white.  Maybe I could have NOT used four different fonts.  I can't point it out exactly, but the design is just.... off.

Anywho... done is done.  It's posted and I can't (or at least I won't) take it back.  The best I can hope for is that Helena sees something in it that I don't.  Maybe she'll even see a complete cap where I see a work in progress.

Oh... and I hope that you get some level of enjoyment out of it as well.

7 comments:

  1. Caitlyn,

    I think at least most of us understand your feeling.... We've posted captions that we know are just not our best, but put it out there anyway.... so the effort wasn't just wasted. Sometimes we go back and clean it up, sometimes not :)

    This definitely not my style of cap, so I'll not critique the story, save that it does seem a little... unfinished... abrupt, perhaps?

    On the layout... It's hard to say. It's not how I would have done it, but you have a much more diverse style than my limited one, so you can pull of layouts I wouldn't even try. About the only negative I see is the background washes out the text a bit. I would have made the separation more overt, not less. But that's me :)

    Regardless, a less than perfect caption from you is by far a better caption than most people ever make, so don't be too hard on yourself.

    /hugs

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    1. Britney,

      Thanks for the comment. I guess the issue I have with this is that I DID really like it when it was posted to Helena's folder on the Haven. It was only after posting that I began to see deficiencies.

      On the story front, it certainly isn't my 'normal' storytelling method. I am normally quite overt in explaining what's going on, but in this one (and in many recent captions) I"m getting more spartan with my descriptions and leaving more and more up to the reader to 'get'.

      I agree on the text. It needs to be separated more. The problem is that separating the text from the background takes away from the light airy feel of the photo... in other words I want it both MORE and LESS separated.

      I'll try not to be too hard on myself. I'm finding that to be more of a challenge than before though (and lets face it, it WAS a challenge before!) since my output has been reduced so much. I have less opportunities to make something really special and want every single one to be as good as it can get.

      Again, thanks for your comment!

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  2. I'm sorry Caitlyn, but I'm afraid I must respectfully disagree. The entirety of this cap is wonderful. The graphical layout is superb. And the story told, using so few words, is magical. I almost think it sounds a bit autobiographical given some of the things you've shared about the dichotomy between Calvin and Caitlyn. What do you think?

    Kisses,

    Leeanne

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    1. Leeanne,

      Thank you! I didn't try to make this about my own struggles at all, but now that you mention it, it could fit into my own personal story. Maybe that's what Caitlyn felt when she left me.

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  3. I haven't visited the Haven at this moment, but did check my mail to be sure this is for me. Once again I visit your blog, and find a real gem, made for me.

    Leeane already put it very eloquent, and I only can agree, but not only that, I feel like you captured me, or at least whom I aspire to be. I try not to hold a grudge against people who wronged me, although that is hard at times.
    The times I tried to get even with people in the past, were the times I ended up hurting myself even more. Trying to make the best of a situation works better for me.
    What Leeane said about the dichotomy between Calvin and Caitlyn is right, but I also believe the part of you that is Caitlyn felt what would make a great cap for me, and the part of you that is Calvin began to doubt. While it is different than yours, there is a dichotomy between Helena and Harm as well.

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    1. Helena,

      I'm glad that you enjoyed the cap and very happy that it captured you (or at least the you whom you aspire to be!). I too want to be the type of person that can let things go and not desire revenge.

      I think that dichotomy exists for many of us caption artists. The main difference is just how wide that gap is. For me, that gap used to be very small. Now it feels more like the grand canyon.

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