Thursday, August 2, 2012

[Question] Questions from my 'No.1 admirer'

Let me drop everything I'm doing and take care of you right now...

Lamorak (my self titled Number 1 Admirer) has sent in several questions, and it seems I'm making him upset by taking a few days to work out answers, and... you know... doing other things in my life.  Without further adu, here are all of Lamorak's questions and my answers to them:

Thanks for answering my query, Caitlyn, though I've got a few more. 1: Are you a good enough artist to write and draw a comic strip like JULIA JAMES? 2: I have a deliciously wicked imagination, so how about we join forces? With 35 years of writing experience under my belt, and your sophistication, knowledge and talent, we'd make an unbeatable team!
What do you say?

1) No.  I am not a good enough artist to draw any type of comic strip.  I once drew a comic strip that only involved stick figures, and no one could understand what was going on in them.  My skills lie more in photography, photo manipulations and layouts.

2) When you first sent in this question I had the intent of saying 'why not?'.  In general I like collaborating on projects as getting different points of view can not only expand my horizons, but can let me create art that I wasn't capable of doing on my own.  But considering that you got upset because I took too long to answer a couple of your questions even though I had "plenty of time to compose an answer", I would have to now say no.  No, I would not like to join forces with you.  While I'm sure your 35 years of writing experience could make a good story, I like to work with people that have some patience, and understand that running this blog and making these caps is PART of my life, and not ALL of my life.

Hello, again, Caitlyn. I really am grateful for Jenna's Diary. Who's the lovely beauty in the b/w photos~I am probably one of the few people in England who can appreciate something made in black and white as well as colour. My only criteria is that it has to be well-written, edited and published, and for a TV series it's got to be well-scripted, with good actors and actresses, with a believable plot, a first-rate author, editor. producer and director. However, I've run into a problem with Jenna's Diary. I can't make out what the  entry for June, Was 7/27/12 is. Can you tell me what it says, please? Your No.1 admirer, Lamorak Korving

I do not know who the woman is in the photo used in "Jenna's Diary".  I found the image using a Google Image Search and don't recall the website it came from.  Upon using another search, I found it used on several other sites, but it wasn't part of a set, nor was it identified (it was used much like I did... as a graphic for a post).

I too appreciate black and white.  My only criteria is that it looks good.

As to what Jenna's Diary says, I assume you are mentioning the story on the cap.  I used a more 'hand written' font to give it the feel of a diary.  Sorry that you could't make it out.  The text in the cap is:

Jenna Winn 7/27/12

Dear Diary, it has been almost a week since th "miracle", and it shows no signs of reversing itself. I don't know how or why it happened, but I'm just going to say it... I really love the new me. I don't think I could bear to go back to the way I was before. The problem isn't that I don't look like a Jeffery anymore. It's just that this me... .as far as I can tell, doesn't exist in the real world. My job, my family, my friends, my... .everything, belongs to Jeffery. How could they see that we are the same person? How can I convince them that this is real? How can I tell them that it not only is me... .but I wanted it... .I needed it... this "miracle"


If you are instead referring to what is written on the piece of paper IN the photo... well I have no idea.  I've blurred the image so any detail that was originally there is now gone.


Now both of those questions were sent in about six hours apart on July 30.  Now just to let everyone know, when you send something in via the 'Ask Caitlyn A Question' toolbox, I get only what you send to me.  I get a name if you fill it out, and the question.  I don't get your email, or any other contact information.  So the only way I can answer these questions is by making a post like this.

Yes, I could have answered the question about the text in "Jenna's Diary" in a comment on that post, but I didn't want to answer that part before I answered the previous question(s).  And I didn't know if you were referring to the text of the cap, or what was written on the paper inside the photo.  When I saw the question I intended to pull the image into Photoshop and play around with it just to see if I could pull out the text there... but that would take some time and I didn't have it in me to do it hat moment I read the question.

So I hope you can understand why I was a little surprised to see this comment on "Nerdy is Sexy" about 24 hours later:

Caitlyn, last night I wrote you a question about Jenna's Diary, and I asked you if you would tell me what was scripted, so would you please tell me what was written on your ultra-cool site? I don't wish to appear pushy or rude, so if I come across as such, I'd like to apologise in advance, and put forth a suggestion for a story: a perfectly normal pregnant girl, by a freak act of fate, discovers to her shock that her brother is now the pregnant one, and in order to return to his own body, he has to give birth to 'her' baby and also breast-feed the infant? Your pantied friend, Lamorak.

I DID find it a bit pushy to ask so soon after asking the first time.  But you did say that you didn't want to appear that way, so I let it go and replied with this:


Thanks for your questions. I did receive and read both and will be making a [Question] post out of them. I have just been busy the last couple days. 

As to your story idea, I think it's a good one. But it's something outside of my comfort zone. Pegnancy and breast feeding personally don't do anything for me, and I find it hard to gear up for it. That being said, I'll take your suggestion as a challenge and try to make a cap out of it. I am about 7 caps in debt, so it will come after those.

I though letting you know that I had been busy but did intend on answering the questions would be satisfactory.  Evidently I was wrong.  Today at 2:26 Lamorak posted a comment on "[Question] When did you first become interested in the TG scene...?":

Caitlyn, I get tired of having to repeat my own

This was followed by about 183 empty lines and continued with....

Caitlyn, I'm getting tired of having to repeat myself.  So unless you can answer a question I have asked you nicely twice before, and ddn't answer-even though you had plenty of time to compose an answer. So, for the third [sigh] time, it's about Jenna's Diary. WHAT DO THE ENTRIES SAY? That's all I want to know. I remain your frustrated No.1 admirer, Lamorak Korving. Oh, and in case you were wondering, it's my real name, and I'm male, albeit epileptic. I consider myself a sissy, and proud to be one.

First... why the hell are you blowing up a post that has nothing to do with the post you are asking about?

Second... I have to assume that you are in fact NOT tired of repeating yourself, as you've done it three times in as many days.

Third... please no shouty caps (as I've come to call them after reading "Fifty Shades of Grey").

Fourth... I'm the one that will determine if I've had 'plenty of time', thank you.  Yes, I may have had time to plop up a boring all text post, or add a comment with the text from the cap (I probably would have either replied directly to your comment or added a comment to the post you were talking about), but I wanted to give you more.  I wanted to have a little fun and try to figure out what was written IN the photo.  And if I couldn't figure out, I was going to write up my own version just to make it a little more fun.

Fifth... I wasn't wondering about your name.  I try to accept people as they present them self.  If you want me to call you Lamorak Korving, then I'm happy to do so.  If you want me to call you Barbie Twotoes, then I'd be happy to do that as well.

Sixth... I'm glad that you consider yourself a sissy and are proud of it.


Now if that's where this was left off, I probably would have made up a much nicer post.  I would have answered the questions and gone those extra few yards to entertain, and not simply answer the question.  But when I sat down at my computer I was greeted by the following email (when you use the "Ask Caitlyn A Question" it sends me an email notice):

Caitlyn, I'm getting seriously pissed off about your refusal to answer a specific question I sent in at least twice! It is about the Monday, July 30, 2012 entries for Jenna's Diary. I'm assuming the lovely young woman in the b/w photos is Jenna herself. My question is: What has she written? It's like looking at Egyptian hieroglyphics. Please, in plain English, tell me what the journal entries say, oh yes, that Haven Magazine, although I live in St. Albans in the United Kingdom in England, would it be possible to buy an issue?

Let me tackle the Haven Quarterly question first.  I assume that you can purchase it without problem.  It's an eZine and will be delivered digitally.  But you'll have to ask the wonderful staff at Rachel's Haven how to get a payment to them.  I believe I saw that their paypal account has been suspended.

On to the rest of you 'question':

I honestly don't understand how you can get 'seriously pissed off' about me not answering a question on YOUR schedule.  I may not be the busiest girl around, but I do have other things in my life that I attend to.  Just a few things that I've tried to do since you asked your first question:

  • Fixing a computer (well.. spending six hours TRYING to fix a computer and failing)
  • Getting a temporary fix on my central AC unit, and cleaning up the 10 foot wide puddle in my basement
  • Trying to fix my car and failing (broke the seat this weekend, and need to do some welding)
  • Trying to fix a family member's car and failing (AC only blows out on the feet, and only on the lowest fan speed)
  • Draining the bucket out every couple hours as the AC unit was continuing to leak
  • Watching the AC Tech for several hours while he fixed the unit (clogged pipe)
  • Trying to make new caps (and failing)
  • Trying to role play (and failing)
  • Searching for and applying to 20 job postings
  • I did eat several times in the past three days
  • I did sleep several times in the past three days

These are only thing things that i felt obligated to do.  And yes, I do feel obligated to make caps and role play.  I feel obligated to role play as I've made a commitment to someone else to play a character and whether I feel in the mood or not, I keep my commitments.  I feel obligated to make caps not only to return the wonderful caps people have made for me (some of them over a month ago), but also for 'fans'.  

But that's only the list of things I felt obligated to do.  I also tried to get some 'me' time in.  Watching the Olympics, Watching "The Glenn Miller Story" on DVD.  Playing a computer game with my nephews.  Replying to comments here.  Viewing other TG/TF/CD blogs.  

So while you may feel that I had ample time to answer your question, I would counter by saying that no, I in fact did NOT have time to answer it.  At least not in the entertaining way I wanted to.  

If you don't like that answer.... Tough.  It's my answer.  

I've taken days and even occasionally weeks to answer a question sent in to me as I don't want to just give an answer.  I want to entertain.  I want to create a nice graphic like the 'angry' woman up at the top of this post.  And most of all, I want to be in the right 'mood'.  I want to fully have my Caitlyn Mask on and answer you in her persona... not the Angry Mask that I now have glued to my face. 

You say you are getting 'seriously pissed off'?  Well I have news for you, you've gotten me to the very same place.  I sat down a couple hours ago (yes, it's taken me over two hours to make this post!) with every intent to make a cap.  I have an image, and I finally have the backbone of a story to go with it.  I had my Caitlyn Mask on and was ready to make a fun cap.  But that mask was ripped off by your snide and rude 'question'.  If you don't have the patience and common decency to wait three days for me to answer the dozen or so questions you've posed, then I'd ask you to NOT ask any more.  


  1. Wow, Caitlyn, I don't envy you the asshats that have begun plaguing you en masse. First, the prolific nutter in the "Rules" thread, and now this dipshit.

    Of Mr. Lamp-Rack (looks okay at a glance but really makes no sense) I can say this: Christ, what an asshole.

    1. Thanks Victoria. I think you summed up what I was thinking very well. BTW, i'm going to have to bookmark that page!!

    2. Caitlyn,you're right, of course, although
      WHY anyone wants to watch the Olympic Games when they could rent a movie to be
      entertained, baffles me. But then again,
      it's your life, and I crossed the line,
      which is why, Caitlyn, I sent you an apology today, August 3rd, 2012, and hope you will accept it in the contrite and heartfelt manner it was meant to convey. Yours in contrition, Lamorak Korving.

      and hope you will accept
      it in the contrite manner I tried to convey.

  2. Popularity brings a bevy of attention; both good and bad. I hope this doesn't sour you for making more work. I'm still glad you shared and I know you have more reasons than usual to do it.

    1. Thanks Simone. I agree, I have to take the good with the bad. And even considering this recent cap making mood destroying 'question', I still think i'm coming out ahead... Jenna's comments alone are worth dealing with these other people.

      As for souring my mood... well my mood to cap today has been utterly snuffed out. Hopefully it will come back tomorrow. Tonight will be spent watching swimming and gymnastics.

  3. LOL...(not at you)...but I love this image also...and almost wanted to write something to go with it. :) Work is calling however, and I don't want to get you into any more "discussions". Clearly, we all want to be paid attention to and are eager to see that we have been noticed and or appreciated...but jeez people. xoxo Jenna

    1. Thanks Jenna. It is a fun image isn't it? I understand work keeping you from writing, but don't ever let crazy discussions happening here stop you from following a creative idea. I loved the story you wrote before and would love to see more! Like I said in this post, I like collaborating for many reasons.

  4. You're way too nice to write such a long entertaining post.

    1. Oh I don't know about that. I can be rather 'un-nice' at times too!

  5. Mmmm a bit scary to say the least to have someone trying to check on what you have to do or what's not... Apparently I already have someone that tells me I should write better in english or not write at all.. - This was due to me writing a game in RAGS and asking for help in the TF/TG gamesites and someone who apparently not get the reason of me being non native, wants me to write in a perfect english after checking on my blog for the first time >_> - So yeah not the same argument but I can feel that sentiment of having someone pushy checking on you...

    And yes like Sasha said, really entertaining post haha

    About the Olympics... I've been watching them, but it seems we are not having such luck this year, let's see about Basketball and Tennis, we can do something there yet :P

    Hugs and Kisses Alectra

    1. Well thankfully while certain people can be curious and even pushy in their requests for information, they can't rally check up on me. I value my privacy enough to not let out my name and home town.

      I did enjoy watching the Olympics last night. Having spent so many years photographing Gymnastics It's a real pleasure to watch the world's best compete like that. I'm surprised to see such a wide difference in the country's medal counts, but I'm sure the Spanish teams are all having fun!

    2. Well I've seen that USA has sent over +500 atbletes haha. Spain sent only more or less 250 athletes... and like I said a bad year indeed. We had a problem in Waterpolo with that last phantom goal, we had problems in Football (who would had said...?) Our biggest tennis player wasn't ready to the Olympics, and really the competition is hard. I'm still undoubtful that we will be able to crush USA's Dream team - and yes be patriotic now *giggle* - but the Silver medal is a sure shot for the basketball team.

      Add to that, some of our sport centers are in no way to be compared to other countries. Apart from waterpolo, swimming, tennis, football, basketball, handball and some others we aren't that lucky to have great sports centers...

      And really Who would beat Phelps or Usain Bolt? Those men are not from this planet haha

      Hugs and Kisses Alectra

  6. Hiya, Caitlyn! You're one seriously cool babe, ya know,
    with an [clears throght] seriously cool site! No, really! Have you ever collaborated with Annabelle Raven-or, to give you her full name, Annabelle Raven Hyde, on a story-any captioned story? Oops! I almost
    forgot to give you my name. My official name is Blogorak, but I prefer being just called Blog, otherwise people confuse me with Lamorak, a cousin of mine. Do you like classical music? I do. My favourite is Gnossienne No.1 by Erik Satie. I also like Greek and
    Indian music. And third, have you ever thought of becoming a woman? After all, boys and men do have mammary glands and breasts, just like girls do. The only reason you can't see a boy's breasts is because
    (ahem!) they are kept "under wraps" for want of a better
    term. Only if a youth suffers from Gynaecomastia=enlarged breasts in males, a medical condition, will the boy or man develop breasts as prominent as a girl's. Some decide to have surgery to
    remove the breasts, while others decide to keep them.
    Don't ask me why, as I don't know why. That said, would you please ask Jenna Winn if she has her own site, and if so, what it's called! Love & Best Wishes, Blog.

    1. Well blog... after going round and round with Lamorak, I hope you'll understand that I'm more than a little doubtful that you are merely Lamorak's cousin. But I'll still answer.

      No, I haven't collaborated with Annabelle. I've only really collaborated with Jennifer a couple years ago and with Jenna here just recently.

      I do like classical music. I've had many pieces that have at one time or another sat as my 'favorite'. If I had to put my finger on one right now, I'd have to say it's Dog Mountain's version of Pachelbel's Canon in D.

      Many of my fantasies involve becoming a woman, although I am happier with remaining a man for the time being.

  7. To make it easy for you Caitlin...I don't have a blog ...I can't imagine finding the time for it. Jenna

    1. Thanks Jenna. I would normally say that running a blog is worth the extra time, but right now I'm struggling with that idea.

  8. Having just got back from watching the Olympics and spending the entire weekend TG free with my friends, it occurs to me to wonder whether some people realise that TG captioners have a life outside the internet?

    I enjoyed your spirited defence and deconstruction of the silly emails, but really Caitlyn there's no need to defend yourself to anyone. You are great and you can take as long as you like to do stuff!

    1. Thanks Evie. I think it goes beyond some people thinking that we captioners are here online only for their enjoyment. This particular person hasn't been able to take subtle or gross hints, or even a direct request to just leave me alone. I've received more comments from him since posting this, and several 'Ask Caitlyn A Question' emails.

      I'm done dealing with him. His comments will get deleted, and his emails ignored.

  9. I'm just sorry you went through this.

    Screw that, I'm sorry anyone EVER went through this. It's just plain ridiculous...

    I am glad you are back to making captions :D

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