Just Do as I Do

It's not always going to turn into a sexual fantasy!

I’d been attracted to TG porn for some time now, but never really thought of myself as transgendered.  It was just a fetish.  I’d always kept that side of myself from girlfriends, but when I met Addie, I knew she was the one that I’d share everything with.  She was surprised with my fetish and a little turned off at first, but she turned around and reluctantly accepted it.  As she didn’t seem to like it, I just figured it would be something that I’d give up and move on from.  Hell, with a serious girlfriend it wasn’t like I needed porn anyway, right? 

Then last month Addie and her mother had an ‘intervention’ with me.  Addie said she’d talked to her friends about my secret.  Then her college professor.  Then her mom.  And while it was embarrassing to think of all these people suddenly knowing about a sexual fetish of mine, Addie said they all thought it was something deeper than that.  At that point her mother chimed in and said that I might really be transgendered and should explore that in an open area where no one would judge me.  She even pointed out how her daughter was bisexual and part of what attracted her to me was that I was already fairly feminine. 

While I was blushing seventeen shades of red with the thoughts of Addie’s mother knowing of her bisexuality and thinking that I looked feminine, she continued.  She said that if her daughter was to continue a relationship with me, that I had to be open and explore this side of myself.  That after I had done so, I would know if I were transgendered or not.  If I were, they would help me through my transition and maybe Addie and I could continue on as girlfriends.  And if I weren’t, then they could continue on and be assured with my masculinity.  While Addie seemed hopeful and re-assuring, I could see the ultimatum in her mother’s eyes;  Do this or leave her daughter forever. 

So for the next month while Addie went to stay with a friend in California, I moved into her room and became ‘Caitlyn’.  June, as I was to call Addie’s mother while I stayed with her, had one simple rule… I was to do everything that she told me to do, and everything that she did.  On day one I learned just how open Addie’s relationship was with her mother as she showed me how a ‘good girl’ cleaned herself.  I joined her naked in their spa like shower and watched her not only clean herself with several types of soaps, but also shave her legs and legs, and use a hair removal cream everywhere else.  By the end of the shower my skin was baby smooth everywhere below my eyebrows.  She then told me that a girl my size would have sizeable breasts and produced to realistic looking breast forms.   Only the thought of losing Addie kept me from running from the room, and a few moments later I had two breasts glued onto my chest. 

While I was afraid I was going to spend every waking moment in dresses, June actually let me dress like a normal girl most of the time.  Jeans, shorts, tshirts, and even normal button up shirts.  But I quickly learned the difference of dressing like a boy and dressing like a girl.  While my clothes were normally loose and comfortable, my new ‘Caitlyn’ clothes were all tight form fitting numbers that enhanced my body shape.  And when my body wasn’t shaped right, June had padding and undergarments to make sure it ended up being shaped right.  The tshirts hugged my breasts and showed them off.  The shorts pulled between and lifted my butt cheeks.  The jeans hugged my legs.  And the button up shirts were always tied up and left open to show off my hairless belly and my bra. 

Clothes was one thing, but June made sure that every morning I was by her side and working on my hair and face.  The second day was actually in the hair salon and while I had dreams and nightmares about that particular TG sexual fantasy coming true, it was actually fairly harmless.  The ladies there were all professional and open about what I was going through.  They helped me pick out some hair extensions and then showed me how to work them into my hair, giving me long flowing light brown hair.  They offered to style it, but June said she would show me how to do that myself.  The rest of the appointment was the annoying process of having my eyebrows waxed almost entirely away and being assured that they’d grow back if I wanted them to. 

Once we got makeup, hair, and dressing down to a reasonable time, June and I would go out and do some shopping or go out to the nail salon in the afternoons.  My nerves were all a flutter at first, but June actually took it easy on me.  She was open and honest and told me I could introduce myself however I wanted.  Calvin, Caitlyn, or whatever name I chose.  I could tell them I was a boy, a girl, or transgendered.  I could even choose to not speak and let her do the talking and she would just avoid the subject and refer to me as her niece if pressed but otherwise steer the conversation away from me.  Slowly it became normal and in the spirit of trying this out I let people call me Caitlyn and actually learned to speak in a fairly respectable feminine form.  It wouldn’t fool people in the long term, but it would do for short, quiet conversations. 

The evenings were spent talking.  Sometimes we’d watch movies or TV but the viewing was always geared to spur on some kind of gender conversation.  I learned more of the nuts and bolts of what it was to be a woman.  Sure, sometimes we talked about sex and sexuality, but most of it was just the differences between men and women.  How physical differences separated the sexes, how society separated us and was starting to evolve, how some men and even some women wanted women to be less than equal partners and others wanted us women to be full equals to men.  When it did tun to sex, I was a little slow to talk about actual scenarios as it involved talking about Addie…. June’s daughter.  So instead I focused on what I figured she wanted to hear.  My TG sexual fantasies.  I talked about how it was more often than not about being forced and a lot of the time just about sex.  I actually choked on my diet coke when June offered to bring out a dildo and show me how to perform fellatio.  Thankfully she took that reaction as me declining and didn’t bring it up again, although we did continue to talk about the fantasies. 

I have to admit; this month hasn’t been what I thought it would be.  There was a small part of me that thought it was going to end up like some sexual TG story… that at any moment it was going to be all ‘give him a BJ or else’ or ‘Hey, I told you do as I do young lady! And as you can see I’m letting him fuck me in the ass!’.  But I’ve learned more about women in these thirty days than I have in the last couple decades of my life. 

When June told me that Addie was coming home at the end of the week I was almost a little sad.  Oh, don’t get me wrong, I was all kinds of ready to be done with this experiment.  As I knew all along, I was in no way trans gendered.  While I was happy to learn about being a woman, I had no interest in becoming one and would be very happy in returning to my normal life as Addie’s boyfriend Calvin.  So, when I heard the car pull up I got excited, figuring that maybe June was wrong… maybe Addie was home early and I could ditch the panties!  Wanting to give Addie proof that I gave this my best try, I rushed down to the door, put on my sexiest pose, closed my eyes, threw the door open, and said in my sexiest feminine voice “Welcome Home Lover!”

My heart stopped cold when I heard the man’s mirthful deep voice say in return “Well this is quite the surprise!   Who exactly do we have here…. Lover!?”

My eyes flew open and I saw a tall man standing there with a confused half smile on his face.  I took a step back, getting ready to run away in full on humiliation when I felt June’s arm pull around my shoulders and hold me tightly in place.  She explained, in-between giggles, that I was Addie’s friend Caitlyn and I was staying over for a few days while waiting for Addie to come home.  She then introduced her fiancé Denzell and told me that he would be staying over as well for a few days on a long layover. 

After shaking my cold sweaty hand and giving me a hug as a hello, Denzell pulled his bags inside and went to unpack in June’s room as she took me into the kitchen to explain.  She told me that I had been doing so good that she wanted to give me one last test.  That so far, I had been ‘trying out’ living as a girl and letting people, mostly women and mostly her, see me as a boy transitioning.  But that I was doing well enough to pass and that I should really give this a try and let me both live a few days really as a girl and let a man see me as just that… a girl. 

With a reassuring pat to my shoulder she told me that she would test me in a few last ways and that if I went through them all we all could be sure one way or the other that I was all man, or a real transgendered woman.  With a chill running down my back, and an image coming straight out of my nightmare fueled TG fantasies June winked and said “Just Do as I Do” as Denzell walked into the room and prevented me from saying or asking anything. 

And from that point on, it seems that no matter how hard I tried to make it happen I couldn’t get June alone to talk to her.  The few times I had just a moment with her she was telling me what clothes to put on or giving me a list of chores to do and then walking out of the room.   Oh, she talked ‘about’ me to Denzell, but covered it in a way to explain my nervousness around him without cueing him in on my actual gender.  She told me I was a lesbian and Addie’s new girlfriend and had grown up in a family full of women, so I wasn’t used to being around a man so much.  She then added on that both she and Addie thought that I was bisexual and were trying to get me more comfortable around men and that I would appreciate him paying more attention to me.

That’s why as often as he could Denzell would sit next to me, put his arm around me, hug me, tell me how cute or beautiful or sexy I looked, caress my face, and finally at June’s insistence even kiss me.  I’d find myself stiffening up in surprise at every touch and blushing in embarrassment at every comment, but Denzell was the constant gentleman and never pushed past my comfort zone.  Or at least what June told him was my comfort zone.  The evenings discussions were finished and were now replaced with ‘Just Do as I Do’ nights.  June and Denzell would show me how a boyfriend and girlfriend would act together and then I would have to mimic them until I could do it well enough to please June. 

The first night was easy… talking and flirting.  Sure, it was embarrassing as all get out to look into another man’s eyes and tell him he was cute or hold his hand and laughing at all of his jokes, or twisting my long hair and winking at him, but that was easier than the next night… petting.  The whole damned night I had to have Denzell’s hands all over my body.  Sitting next to him as his hand wrapped around my shoulders and caressed up and down my bare arm.  Curled up next to him as he rubbed his hand over my bare belly.  Lying down with my head on his lap, his hand caressing my hip.  And then it got worse as I had to ‘pet’ him… my hand slyly rubbing over his broad shoulders as we sat side by side.  Rubbing over his forearm and biceps with one hand as our other fingers intertwined.  Resting my head on his shoulder as my hand rubbed over his big strong thigh.    I almost jumped through the roof as I was listening to June tell me to keep my hand moving lightly upward and inward when he interrupted and reminded me that I was no longer rubbing on his thigh.  FUCK!!! I’d given him a HARD ON AND WAS RUBBING IT!!!

Their laughter followed me up the stairs, but thankfully that ended the night of petting.  Unthankfully it didn’t stop the next night of Just Do as I Do.  Kissing. 

Kissing Denzell was more emasculating than the entire thirty days spent dressing as a girl.  It might not have been so bad if I could have just kissed him once and been done with it, but June had us kissing all night long.  She had us kissing light and easy.  She had us kissing soft and pretty.  She had us kissing hot and heavy.  She had us kissing each other’s faces and necks.  She had us kissing using our tongues.  She had us kissing while standing, while sitting, and even while Denzell lied over me and pinned me down.  Helpless doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt under a man as he fed me his tongue over and over, all while being given instructions on how to moan and kiss back from another woman. 

But that was then and this is now.  Addie comes home tonight and now we have to go pick her up at the airport.  June and Denzell agreed that it would just be one more half night of Just Do as I Do, so I rushed to get ready knowing that it would be the last time shaving my legs.  The last time pulling up a thong between my ass cheeks.  The last time applying lipstick.  The last time brushing out this long hair.  The last time squirming my way into these way to tight shorts.  When I was all ready I swallowed the last bit of my pride, readied myself for whatever June had planned for the next hour or so and went to the living room.  Doing all this stuff with June wasn’t easy, and then doing all this stuff with Denzell was hard… but waiting for them to come downstairs was even harder.  After 20 minutes, I finally decided that I’d better get them, or we’d be late to the airport.  When I knocked on June’s bedroom door I heard Denzell tell me to come in, so I opened the door wide, stepped in and….

Denzell’s voice pulled me from the hypnotizing view of June’s lips moving up and down his long thick cock.  “Oh, hey Caitlyn!  Look, we were going to skip tonight’s game, but why not join in!  Come on over here and remember… Just Do as She Does!”

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The image source on this one was from a Google image search, although the image is from Babes.com.  

As you may know, I've lost touch with my Caitlyn side.  One of the normal ways I know she's coming back when this happens is I get inspired to write here first, so on several fronts this may be good news.  The first front is that I didn't have to push to make this Obscura.  In fact, I didn't even intend to write this story out.  

What got me going was some research this morning.  I'm looking up cruises, specifically 4-5 night cruises that include an overnight stay in Cuba for next year.  That's a longer story and I might go into more detail about it on the other blog at another time, but for now suffice it to say that I spent a few hours this morning researching cruise ships and cruise behaviors.  It struck me that a cruise ship would actually be a good setting for a TG story.  You see, the types of stories I generally like have a time element to it.  Like "I only have to get through tonight, and then this will all be over" type thing.  Well a cruise ship actually has a few of those built in.  Let's take the cruise I'm looking at as an example.   

The first time frame is the cruise itself.  4-5 days and then you're back at the port you started at.  Then if you have a port of call, there is the time you are at port... say for 8 hours.  If you are overnight, then it's even better as you have until say noon the next day.  Plus there are plenty of smaller time frames.... the pool times, or the casino hours, or any of the 'shows'.  So plenty of ways for time to play a part in a story and plenty of ways for the hero/heroine to think something like 'only a few more minutes/hours and this will be all over'.  

Here's the basic story line I had in mind.  A couple guys go on a cruise.  The hero isn't in to cruises, but looks at it as a luxury hotel on water... lots of booze, good food, plenty of time to read.  He figures he doesn't have to hit the pool or interact with anybody while his 'buddy' can interact and have all the fun he wants.  I don't know why they go together as they don't sound like the type to travel together, but maybe it's a contest... I don't know, it's a detail I'd work out.  Anyway, they get on the boat and the hero finds out that he has basic access, but all the good stuff costs extra... and he doesn't have any extra money.  He saved up and spent all his money on airfare and getting on the ship itself.  So he only gets the basic buffet, he gets no booze (or only basic bar access), no access to the clubs or fancy restaurants, and can't even afford any of the port excursions.  At first he's happy to read, but his kindle gets damaged and reset.  He can't afford the internet access to re-download his books, so now he doesn't even have that.  

So while he's wandering around and trying to find something to do he sneaks into the theater and watches the musical group practice.  He makes the mistake of making fun of them but is overheard and threatened by some of the guys in the group.  The other performers get him out of there, but he breaks down as he realized he was saved by a bunch of girls.  They take pity on him and get him some good food and drinks and even get him drunk.  They offer to take him out at the next port, but he has to agree to help them out backstage during their next show.  I'm not going to go into the details here, but he agrees and ends up getting made over as one of the backup dancers in the production.  One of the female dancers.  He counts down the minutes until the show ends, praying that no one catches him.  The show ends and everybody heads to the club right after, pulling him along without letting him change.  Now he has to be 'one of the girls' in a club full of passengers on a party cruise.  The girls take pity on him and try to help, but they want to party too. so only one stays by his side at at time... and as the night goes on that 'safety girl' gets more and more drunk putting him closer and closer to getting found out.  He counts down the minutes until the club closes until it finally does at 4am. 

Of course the theater is locked up and he can't get access to his clothes or his key-card and he doesn't' dare let his 'friend' see him, so he lets the girls take him to their room to change him into some of their clothes.  They make him almost too passable (he's beyond cute), and they take him out to a Caribbean beach town.  He starts out nervous, counting down the hours until they can get back onto the ship and into the theater, but as he drinks and relaxes he starts to enjoy himself.  Then the guys from the show meet up with the girls... he nearly has a heart attack as he remembers their threat but they dont' recognize him.  In fact, they start hitting on him as 'one of the new girls'.  He tries to fall into the role of 'one of the new girls' hoping that the guys won't ever suspect who he is, even as the girls try to get him to calm down and stop.  

Once the girls get him away from the guys, they explain that 'the new girl' in the show for every cruise has to give one of the guys a BJ before the end of the cruise.  The girls try to laugh it off as he gets really humiliated, realizing thats why the guys were being really nice... they were all trying to be 'That Guy' and imagining him going down on them.  

They get back on the boat, but the theater director dresses down the entire group about how messy they left the backstage area and the dressing room.  He tells them that everything has been sent to the laundry and it will be delivered back tomorrow.  Our heroine's heart drops as he realizes he's stuck performing for another night as a backup dancer.  

The guys of course mack all over him/her trying to convince him/her that he/she'd love giving them a blowjob making him/her all the more nervous about performing that night.  The show goes off, this time with even sexier dance wear.  This time the performers dont' have to go to the club, so several of the girls take pity on him and invite him back to their room.  They sit, chat, drink, smoke a little pot, and have a nice sexy lesbo time.  

They wake up late to the theater director barging in, giving our heroine barely enough time to get the sheet over his body and telling them they're late.  They have to get ready as they're at the Havana port and have to report to the club.... even the new girl.  The girls apologize, but explain that they are performing at one of the Havana nightclubs.  They'd planned on sneaking his clothes out before they left, but now that the theater director saw him with them, they'd get in big trouble if he wasn't with them....

So he has to stay in disguise as one of the performers and go onshore.  He still has all the male performers hitting on him and now has all the local male performers doing the same.  It goes on all day and he starts counting down the hours until the end of the show.  The show goes off but the local performers invite the director and the performers to another club to celebrate.  Of course, he's dragged along in drag and has to endure another night... but this time it's a hot sweaty sexy Havana night.  

Things get heated up and several of the local male performers start really hitting on him/her hard making him really scared.  One of the girls that's taking a shine to him says she has a plan... it seems one of the ships male performers wants to take one of the local female performers back to the ship for a sexy night and if they play along, they can sneak out with them and get a ride back with them.  It will mean playing all sexy and playing up like they want to have a foursome with they guy, but they'll split away once they get to the ship.  Our heroine hates the idea of playing that way, but sees it as the only way out as everybody else looks like they're spending the night in Havana.  They spend another hour or so, the male performer, the local female performer, our heroine, and the female performer who likes our heroine, all playing sexy and getting hot (and humiliated), until they sneak out.  While making their way out of the club though they lose our heroines friend leaving him with the male performer and the local female performer who doesn't speak English.

When they finally get into a car, they don't even head to the ship, instead heading to her apartment deeper inside Havana.  He explains to our heroine that she changed her mind and is afraid of getting in trouble by going on the boat, but is happy to invite them into her bed. 

Yeah.... sexy time ensues.  Our heroine barely keeps his modesty and clothes on, but ends up giving that blowjob.  

That's as far as I got with the story.  I figured I could either end it with him being found, realizing that playing a girl was fun outside of the guys, and hooking up with his new friend (girlfriend), or finding out that his original travel buddy had set up the whole thing as a way for him to get out and find new people, or even just let the ending stay open and have some other ending fill itself in.  

It felt interesting and felt like it would be fun to write... but went to look for a picture I found the one I used in THIS obsucura instead.  And when I found that picture I got the clear and immediate last line of this story... "Come on over here and remember… Just Do as She Does!"  I knew the major points of the story.... dress up under the direction of girlfriends mother to prove he's not a TG, stuck there because of an interest in TG porn, all seems good and even, then the guy comes and it turns into exactly what he thought it was in the beginning ending with sexy BJ time.  

I thought this would be two or three paragraphs, but evidently I got the creative engines running at full speed thinking of the cruise story and so this story ending up going and going and going.  I'm not sure if it's good or worse because of it, but I'll find out in a few days.  Sadly, now that I've written out the summary of the cruise story, I doubt I'll have the interest to actually write out the full story, so that's about as close as you'll ever get to it.  Hope you enjoy it!

In fact... since this may be the only way I express this story, here's an image to go along with it.  Not perfect... but much like the synopsis, good enough!

  (and yes, that's an actual dance group on a cruise ship!)