Wednesday, December 16, 2015


How precise can you be?

The old gypsy woman was very clear with her instructions.  I had to open the bottle up at exactly midnight.  The potion had to air out for precisely five shakes of a baby lambs tail.  Once ready it needed to be immediately be poured into an ancient Grecian kylix that had never been used.  The intended subject needed to drink the entire cups worth between the sun touching the horizon and the sun fully setting. 

If all of these instructions were completely and flawlessly followed the subject would be transformed into my ideal lover.  If any variance occurred no matter how minor, I would end up as that idealized woman myself.  I bowed to the gypsy and promised to come back in a fortnight to tell her how it went.

Two weeks later I walked into the gypsy’s tent.  My long reddish brown hair was cascading down my nude body and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get that smile off of my face.  The gypsy seemed concerned and patted my hand as she asked what had gone wrong.  She had me lay out exactly what I did.   I couldn’t help but giggle as I told her that sometime yesterday afternoon I opened up the potion.  I immediately poured it into a slightly used red solo cup and handed it off to my ex-girlfriend where she took a single sip and then poured the rest down the drain. 

The gypsy’s face was aghast as my smile got wider and said “Look, you were going to charge me twenty five thousand dollars to change me into a woman.  But it only cost me a cool two grand to make up this half assed spell with a bad curse.  I gave it a try and figured that if it worked and I got back together with my ex that would be fine.  But hey, I got precisely what I wanted!  Thanks lady!”

source:  fuskator


  1. Hmmmm, I still think that the buyer beware! It isn't too often that someone gets one over on an old gypsy!