Thursday, January 20, 2011

[Question] Have you thought of turning some of those fantasies into reality?

Another question... and now it gets more personal!

Have you thought of turning some of those fantasies into reality? For example, suck some cock?

The quickest way to answer this.... no.

I know I've danced around it here on the blog, but I am a heterosexual male.  I have no desire for sex of any type with another man.

Now the thought of being a woman?   I would be interested in seeing what that is like.  But as there is no way to conceivably 'try' being a woman without destroying my body, I would still have to go with no.  I say that because I don't want to see what I would look like with breasts, which I could do by wearing a stuffed bra or getting breast forms... I would want to know what having breasts feel like.  The weight, the pull on my skin, the sway.... I don't believe that these can be truly experienced by gluing something on my chest.   I don't want to see what I would look like with a set of pussy lips, which I could by tucking/gaffing my penis and balls back and putting on panties.  I would want to feel what it is like to NOT have a penis.  To have an 'innie' instead of an 'outie'.  If you want to see what it feels like to have a big cock, you don't just glue a big dildo over your cock.

As far as I can tell the only way to experience that would be to have a complete Sexual Reassignment Surgery.  And thats where I get 'destroy my body'.   Now if magic or a technology that I use in my stories existed... oh hell yea.  I would try being a woman.  But I would put that fantasy up there with having the body of a body builder.  Of being a superhero.  Or having a large(r) cock.  Or being an animal.  Being wealthy.  Being smart(er).  Basically being something that I am not.

But at the end of the day I am a man, and I like being a man.  I am attracted to women, and I like being attracted to women. It is part of my identity.  I have no problem with people that want to change their sex, or cross dress.  In fact I really respect people seeking out SRS.  You know that you are not what you want to be, and you are striking out to MAKE yourself what you want to be.  I tried cross dressing in my late teens.  I tried on some panties, nylons, a padded bra, some lipstick, heels, and a dress.  I didn't get any thrill out of the transformation process.  I didn't get any thrill out of dressing or wearing the clothes. I didn't get a thrill out of seeing myself dressed like that.  I did get a thrill out of possibly being caught, but seeing as I would have most likely been caught by a family member and not a sexy next door neighbor (I didn't HAVE a sexy next door neighbor, and didn't want my family to see me experimenting like that), I removed all the clothes and makeup and have never tried again.  If I would have gotten even a LITTLE thrill I would have explored it further.

Some of the other fantasies that I show like humiliation, and submission, I do enjoy.  I just have not yet met a woman that I am interested in and that CAN do these things to me.

But that in no way diminishes the pure joy I get out of the fantasy of being a woman.  Of being transformed into a woman against my will, and being forced into having sex with a man.  That sends shivers up my spine.  Part of experiencing that fantasy is running this blog (and visiting similar blogs and websites) as Caitlyn.


  1. Damn, I knew that you and I thought alike Caitlyn, but I never realized how close the similarity was. What you wrote there, it was like you were looking into my brain and typing what was in there.

    I may just have to make you another cap soon. Whenever I do, it is like making one for me.

  2. Well, it's no secret I have a thing for many of your same fantasy's. including sucking cock. Now, If given the same choice as you presented (advanced technology, magic.)I would jump at the chance no matter what!

    unfortunately none of those options are availble to me. But I have always enjoyed cross-dressing. I started young so it's just something I've almost always been into. the feeling of the fabric, the smell of the perfume and the makeup, heck! The taste of the lipstick.. mmm

    But I have not done so for quite some time, Partly from privacy, but mostly because putting on a dress and some make up dosen't help me pass.

    OK.. Enough about that. Would I suck cock? I almost did! But.. If given the chance way back I never would have thought I would seriously consider. But everything changes and over a year ago I was in talks to set up a little meet and great with a man I know.

    I would have been Jennifer in a sort of... roleplay/wish fulfillment scenario. I could at least pretend and still have the experience.

    The plan fell through however and it was such a shame. It would have been a weekend as Jennifer out of town and lived part of the fantasy.

    Cest le vi

  3. @ Petra

    I will never turn my nose up to a cap from you! And in the same way, making caps for you is always a blast (and always saved with Caitlyn in the place of Petra on my hard drive!)

    @ Jennifer


  4. It's amazing how closely my thoughts parallel to yours (and Petra's). It's good to know that I'm not so much the 'odd duck' that I thought myself to be.

  5. I think you can always tell the cappers like us from the people that have more of an interest in actual crossdressing or more. Not to say one is better or worse, but I just tend to find the outsider caps more interesting.

  6. I tend to agree more with Jennifer - given the technology to be passably or fully female, I'd do it, but for now I don't know if I could... I am a makeup slut, though, with a serious penchant for stockings, lacy underwear, and high stilettos and I think if I could pass I'd love to wrap my painted lips around a big thick cock. But for the most part, I do enjoy being a man.

  7. You are not alone in this world Caitlyn, i'm also a heterosexual male, but the TF and TG universe intoxicates my very own soul for no particular reason, it's kind of exciting to think you are transformed or watching the transformation of others guys or girls, and yet i think i could not try that out in real life :3 buttttt it there was like you say a poof change magical machine that allows to swap your gender then i'm in the same boat as you...

    Hugs and Kisses Alectra